


Too Much

by Ongaku_Ato_Kakikomi



Category: Heathers (1988)
Genre: F/M, Reader-Insert, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:48:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24153817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ongaku_Ato_Kakikomi/pseuds/Ongaku_Ato_Kakikomi
Summary: You just can't do it anymore. (Headcanons)Warning: Suicide attempt.
Relationships: Jason Dean/Reader
Kudos: 35





	Too Much

○ You haven’t really been reacting to any of the killings JD did around the school.

○ You were just so shocked by everything, so hurt inside, that your brain had to numb you for your own survival.

○ The thing is, it made Jason think you were okay with everything he did.

○ With everything he made you do.

○ But you were not okay.

○ You were not okay at all.

○ The more people you and JD killed, the more you could feel the guilt eating you from the inside.

○ You knew that it wouldn’t take long for you to cross over the line, you just hoped you’d find a way to stop all this before you get to it.

○ But Jason didn’t have the intention to stop, and what he said to you this morning made your blood run cold.

○ “ _We’re_ _gonna put bombs under the gym, and tomorrow, when everyone will be at_ _the pep rally, we’re gonna make everything explode!_ ”

○ You just stared at him for a long time, the darkness slowly engulfing your mind.

○ “ _We’re_ _gonna free society together, darling. We’re gonna free ourselves_ _from them!_ ”

○ But you didn’t want to free yourself from them.

○ You just wanted yourself to be gone.

○ That’s why you’re staring at the knife between your hands right now.

○ You’re standing up inside your room in the dark.

○ You know that if you slice your wrists, it’s gonna be done soon.

○ And your parents aren’t home tonight, so no one would be able to save you in time.

○ But… slicing your wrists…

○ It doesn’t seem painful enough for you.

○ You deserve extreme pain for all that you did.

○ You held up the knife in the air towards you, taking a huge breath.

○ You’re about to plunge it unto your chest when-

○ “ ** _NO!_** ”

○ You don’t have time to process what’s have been scream that the knife is getting thrown away from you.

○ When your boyfriend suddenly grabs your arms to turn you towards him, you try to understand what’s happening.

○ “Why would you try to do that!?”

○ His eyes are full of sadness and anger.

○ “(Y/N), answer me!”

○ You don’t understand.

○ How is he here? How-

○ The window’s open.

○ He was probably coming through when he saw you about to kill yourself.

○ You grimace when his grip on your arms starts to hurt you.

○ “Why would you try to leave me!?”

○ You can’t stop the tears going out of your eyes.

○ “ _Jason…_ _I love you so much… but…_ ”

○ His grip gets a little loose when you start to whimper.

○ “ _I_ _can’t kill people anymore. I-I can’t do it, it’s too much…_ ”

○ “W-what… what do you mean you can’t do it?”

○ Your body starts to give out panic jolts, the tears keeping coming out over and over.

○ “ _I_ _think about dying all the time… I just… I just wanna die… it_ _hurts too much…_ ”

○ You manage to hide your face with your hands.

○ “ _Please_ _let me die… **please**_ _just let me die…_ ”

○ “No… _no_ ** _no no_** ** ~~ _no_~~ ~~-~~** ”

○ He holds you as close as possible, almost crushing you.

○ “Don’t die. Don’t you **dare** die.”

○ You feel something wet fall on your neck.

○ Is he crying?

○ “I can’t do this alone….”

○ “Jason…”

○ He gets away to look into your eyes, and you’re shocked to see so much sadness and desperation in his brown orbs.

○ “What is it? You want me to stop everything? I’ll do it! I swear, I’m gonna stop everything! I won’t blow up the school tomorrow I’m gonna stay here with you instead and and and… and I’ll be the best boyfriend too I’ll buy you slushies every day and I’ll listen to you and we’ll do everything you want I swear and I’m gonna find a job and we’re gonna live together and I’ll make you happy-”

○ He then just goes on and on, both of you crying.

○ “Jason, I-”

○ “Please _please_ _please_ don’t leave me… It’s not worth it if you’re gone.”

○ Your heart squeezes so much from pain and love.

○ “… okay..”

○ “Okay?”

○ “I’ll… I’ll live for you…”

○ He looks so relieved at the moment.

○ “Thank you… oh, thank you thank you thank you!”

○ He starts to kiss your face while thanking you over and over, and you actually start to feel hope and a little bit of happiness.

○ He spends the rest of the night and the next day in your room, holding you close and making sure you’re staying alive.

○ He’s gonna make sure you’re happy from now.

○ And everything is gonna be fine.


End file.
